My Magical Family Joke

I can't believe he brought her

I put down my espresso, and began: "My father was the celebrated magician, Alessandro Cagliostri. We didn't see much of him, our family - he travelled a lot, you see - but when he returned..." A lump formed in my throat, and for a moment I could not speak. "Uhm, when he returned, then it was like he had never left. We'd huddle around him all night long, while he showed us card tricks - much to the annoyance of my dear, long-suffering mother."

"Did he ever show you his world-famous sawing-in-half trick?" asked the writer.

I smiled, "Oh yes! He was always trying to improve it, you know, and experimented on us often, trying to get it as realistic as possible."

"And what about your family? You had two brothers I believe?"

"Half-brothers."

Library Hamburger Joke


A man walks up to a librarian at the main desk of the local library, and says in a loud, commanding voice, "I'll take two hamburgers, no mayonnaise, and an order of fries!"

The librarian looks up at him, and replies icily,  "Sir, you may not have noticed, but this is a library."

The man hesitates, but then leans over and whispers in her ear, "I'll take two hamburgers, no mayonnaise, and an order of fries."
Funny Library Hamburger Joke Cartoon Picture