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Irish New Year Toasts Quotes

Funny Irish New Year Toasts Sayings
Funny Irish New Year Toasts Quotes Sayings Ireland St Patrick's Day

May you live to be a hundred years, with one extra year to repent.

As you slide down the bannisters of life may the splinters never point the wrong way.

May your troubles be as few and as far apart as my Grandmothers teeth.

May the roof above us never fall in, and may we friends gathered below never fall out.

May the Lord keep you in His hand and never close His fist too tight.

May your neighbours respect you, Trouble neglect you, The angels protect you, And heaven accept you.

In the New Year, may your right hand always be stretched out in friendship and never in want.

Here's that we may always have a clean shirt, a clean conscience, and a guinea in our pocket.

May you die in bed at ninety-five years, shot by a jealous husband(or wife).

May your doctor never earn a dollar out of you and may your heart never give out. May the ten toes of your feet steer you clear of all misfortune, and before you're much older, may you hear much better toasts than these.


Happy New Year!!!

Funny New Year Joke
A friend asks his friend for a cigarette. His friend says, "I thought you made a New Year resolution to quit smoking".

The man says, " I am in the process of quitting. Right now, I am in the middle of phase one."

"What's phase one?"

"I've quit buying."

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More New Year Jokes and Quotes:

Amazing Street Art - Batman and Robin rescue

Funny Amazing Street Art - Batman and Robin rescue
Amazing Street Art - Batman and Robin rescue

Hobbit Life Quotes

Funny Hobbit Tolkien Quotes
Funny Hobbit Tolkien Quotes

“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.”

“Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?”

“There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something. You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after.”

“Short cuts make for long delays.”

“You have nice manners for a thief and a liar," said the dragon.”

“I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.'
I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!”

“May the hair on your toes never fall out!”

“Trolls simply detest the very sight of dwarves (uncooked).”

Funny Lord of the Rings Legolas Hobbit

Funny Lord of the Rings Hobbit Quotes Tolkien

Christmas Eve Quotes

Christmas Eve Quote
 Christmas Eve Quote

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

- Dr. Seuss


Funny Picture Card - Happy Christmas / Hanukkah

Funny Happy Christmas / Hanukkah Card Picture
Funny Happy Christmas / Hanukkah Card Picture

Amazing Hand Paintings

Amazing Hand Eagle Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings Eagle

Amazing Crocodile Hand Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings Crocodile

Amazing Dog Hand Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings Dog

Amazing Elephant Hand Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings Elephant

Amazing Eagle Bird Hand Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings EAgle

Amazing Zebra Hand Paintings
Amazing Hand Paintings Zebra

Milk Cookie Police Picture

Funny Milk Cookie Police Picture
Police deal effectively with European milk quota riots

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Funny Pic - Turkey Thanksgiving
Funny Pic - Why Turkey Thanksgiving Will Become Extinct
funny blind turkey farmer moo cartoon
funny thanksgiving turkey television man stuffing show cartoon picture
funny thanksgiving turkey television man stuffing show cartoon picture

More Funny Harry Potter Pictures

Funny Harry Potter Cant Act
Funny picture - Leonardo Di Caprio - Voldemort - Titanic
Funny picture - Leonardo Di Caprio - Voldemort - Titanic

Silly Funny Harry Potter Pictures Death Eaters
Funny Harry Potter Pictures - Join the death eaters

Silly Funny Harry Potter Pictures Hogwarts Post Office
Funny Harry Potter Pictures - Hogwarts Post Office 

Silly Funny Harry Potter Pictures Look at Snape
Funny Harry Potter Pictures - Look at Snape. He's limping!

Silly Funny Harry Potter Pictures Hey Potter I'ma boop you on the head
Funny Harry Potter Pictures - Hey Potter I'm a boop you on the head!
Funny Picture Harry Potter Sirius Black
Funny Picture Harry Potter Sirius Black
Funny Picture - Harry Potter Daniel Radcliffe Leonardo Di Caprio
Funny Picture - Harry Potter Daniel Radcliffe Leonardo Di Caprio

Sociology Experiment Joke


Funny Joke - Sociology Experiment

For the purposes of a study into national stereotypes, a German, a Frenchman and a Chinaman were shipped to a deserted island and instructed to create a mini-society. The German was made responsible for infrastructure (buildings, roads etc), the Frenchman for social aspects (food, entertainment) and the Chinaman for supplies.

3 months later, the ship returned to the island to survey the results of their efforts, but were surprised to find the German and the Frenchman sitting idly on the beach.

"Where are the items you were given responsibility for?" they were asked by the study leader.


"Je ne c'est pas, " the Frenchman shrugged, "we had not ze provisions to build or cook or to make l'ambiance."

"What happened to the Chinaman then? He was responsible for the supplies!"

The German replied: "Ve hef not see him for tree muntz."

"But this is very concerning! We need to find him!"

So immediately the group set off into the jungle in search of the missing Chinaman. They searched high and low until suddenly from behind a bush, leapt a very excited Chinaman shouting: "SUPPLIES!!"


(Funny Joke - The Best Joke In The World - Sociology Experiment)

Microsoft Titanic 98

funny pic - microsoft titanic 98

Funny Pic - Microsoft Titanic 98 - What computer do you want to sink today?

Chariots of Fire


So I don't know why anyone was suprised that Rowan Atkinson (Mr Bean) played piano at the London Olympics Opening Ceremony.  The real surprise is that Teddy is missing!

Hitler Caption Competition

Funny Caption Contest Hitler Leonardo Dicaprio silly walk picture
Funny Caption Contest Hitler Leonardo Dicaprio silly walk
This wooden seat is irritating my Himlerhoids. Let's go Sparky. 


Santa Crash

Funny Image Santa No Christmas Plane

Funny Picture Santa No Christmas Plane Father Christmas

Jubilee Queen Charles

Funny Jubilee Queen Charles Image
Funny Jubilee Queen Charles Picture- Look the poor people have bought as a new boat