Funny jokes, insults, puns, pictures, memes, cartoons and gifs.

10 Things Every Wife Ought To Know

How to compliment your wife cartoon joke picture

I saw a list for wives here so thought I'd stand up for the men! ;-)

1. When you ask your man whether your bum looks big in your new dress, expect fear. He doesn't know what to do. Lie and he is in trouble. Tell the truth and he is also in trouble. Its a lose-lose situation.

2. Husbands are not complicated. All they need are admiration, good food, and the occasional romp.

3. Husbands hate buying gifts. Give him a detailed, unambiguous list with fallback options. Whatever you do, don't say "surprise me". That's just cruel.

4. Husbands love their families immensely and will die to protect them. Dishes on the other hand...

5. When a husband says his day was fine, then then its not because he doesn't want to talk to you - its probably all he can remember.

6. Husbands are basically emotionally stupid and will miss everything but the most obvious sulks. Best to just come out and say what's on your mind - he won't get the hint.

7. Husbands don't like to ask for directions. No point trying to analyse this or change us. Just go with it.

8. Husbands don't turn cars around to go back. Forward is the only acceptable direction.

9. Husbands don't enjoy chick flicks.

10. Husbands don't do shopping. What is the point of browsing if there is no predetermined purchasing agenda??

(Funny One Liners - 10 Things Every Wife Ought To Know)