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Last Day

Funny old  postman joke picture

Thirty-five years as a postman, trudging the same route through all kinds of awful British weather, but I still dreaded my last day. Mind you, I needn't have worried - people were so kind.  The Smiths gave me £100, and the Crouches a box of posh cigars, but my biggest surprise was Mrs Miggins.  She opened the door when I knocked and was wearing very little indeed.  She took me upstairs to the bedroom and, well, you know.

Much later we went downstairs where she poured me a pint of ale and cooked a huge steak and chips dinner.  There were a couple of pound coins next to my plate, so when I'd finished, I said, "All this was just too wonderful for words, but what's the money for?"

"Well," she said. "Last night, I told Henry that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'F*ck him. Give him a few quid.' The dinner was my idea."

Funny postman joke