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The Wrong Thing

french woman train american poodle funny joke story

The Marine walked the entire length of the train, looking in vain for a seat, but then spotted what appeared to be a space next to an immaculately dressed woman of a certain age.  Approaching the seat he realised that it was occupied by the woman's poodle.

"Excuse me, ma'am," he asked, pointing at the seat.  "Would you mind if I sat there?"

The woman looked up with indignation and sniffed loudly.  "Americans," she replied in a heavy French accent, "you are so rude.  My little Fifi is using this seat.  She is tired after our outing."

The Marine sighed and searched again for a seat, but as there was none to be had, returned to the woman and said, "Ma'am, may I please sit down? There are no other seats on the train. Perhaps your dog could sit on the ground?"

"On the ground? Sacre bleu!" cried the French woman indignantly. "Not only are you Americans rude, but you are also arrogant!  To think that my Fifi would give up her seat for a scruffy, smelly individual such as yourself!"

The Marine didn't say a word. Instead, he leaned over her, picked up the little dog, and tossed it out of the half-open train window.  Then he squeezed past her and sat down.

The woman shrieked, "Fifi! Stop the train! My Fifi is lost!  Will someone not defend my honour against this vile beast of a man?"

An English gentleman sitting nearby spoke up, addressing the soldier, "Sir, you Americans do really have a penchant for doing the wrong thing: you misspell our words, you hold the fork in the wrong hand, you drive your cars on the wrong side of the road, and now, sir, it seems you have thrown the wrong bitch out the window."

 Funny short joke story French woman on a train with a poodle