What Women Really Mean

What she says...	What she really means...
We need...	I want...
Do what you want.	You'll pay for this later.
I heard a noise.	I noticed you were nearly asleep.
Do you love me?	I'm going to ask you for something really expensive.
How much do you love me?	I did something really terrible today.
We need to talk.	I need to complain.
You're certainly attentive tonight.	Is sex all you think about?
Be romantic, turn out the lights.	I think I'm putting on weight.
The kitchen floor is so hard to clean.	I want a new house.
Hang the picture here.	Hang the picture there.
I'm not yelling.	I'm yelling because I think this is important.
Is my butt fat?	Tell me I'm beautiful.
Do I really look fat in this dress?	We haven't had a fight in a while.
No, pizza's fine.	You tight-fisted slob.
Can we be just friends?	There's no way I'm going to let any part of my body touch you again.
I see you more as a brother.	You have the sexual allure of a sea slug.
I just don't want a boyfriend now.	I just don't want you as a boyfriend now.
It's not you, it's me.	It IS you.
I don't know, what do you want to do?	I can't believe you don't have anything planned!
I just need some space...	... without you in it.
We're moving too quickly.	I'm not going to sleep with you till I find out whether the guy at the gym has a girlfriend.
I'm sorry.	You'll be sorry.
I'll be ready in a minute.	I'll be ready in an hour.
Yes.	No.
No	No
Maybe.	No.